I've decided to write this blog sooner than what I had planned. The reason? Lately, I've been reminded of why I wrote this song to begin with. When I composed Reina, I was living in a small appartment with my boyfriend and we kept fighting for so many little things, but one of the major reasons was because I wanted so much more from him than what he was giving me.
At the time, I had a full time job as an educator in a daycare, and I went home to work on my music (I was signed with a label that was so demanding on songs!) and I had the usual home chores to do. He also had a job, he was a supervisor in a collection agency, the difference between me and him was that he would go home and chill like a king. Now, I understand that he was brought up to think that women do everything while men work and drink their beer but things change. I had a job, my money. Evolution, equality, respect. I'm not saying that he never helped me around the place, but he frequently waited for me to tell him what to do, I felt he was lacking of initiation and it got to a point where it pissed me off! I got really tired of picking up after him and a couple of minutes later he would create a new disaster that I also had to clean up without a single thank you, on the contrary, he would get angry at me for touching his things because now he didn't know where his stuff were. All I really wanted was: "Hey babe, thanks for cleaning, for washing our clothes, for scrubbing the toilet, you must be tired. You need help with the dishes? Sit down, I'll give you a massage." Hmmm...I've always been a dreamer but I guess I keep hoping that one day they will come true.
I still want the same thing. I want to be treated like my man's queen. I want to be loved, fully. I believe in change, and I believe that we all should look at ourselves in the mirror and look. Look deep inside our soul and find our truth. "Am I ok? Am I hurting myself or my partner? What can I do to help?" I wrote Reina out of anger. I was fed up of doing so much and of telling him, because my mother always told me: Hablame, que no soy adivina!, in other words I can't guess what you want. So I stopped expecting and started being honest, saying what I wanted and what I needed but, that also failed with my boy. I felt desperate so I cried and cried all by myself and probably threw some cushions around until finally I sat down and wrote Reina, words that were directly connected with my sorrow.
Everything I say in that song is real and sometimes still is. If there are men reading my blog, know that a large amount of women, including myself, love to feel appreciated and loved and once in a while, swept away! A happy woman will make her man the happiest person in the world. She will take care of you, forever. But when she is sad, pick her up. When you are partners, you should have each others back, no matter how hard the situation is. Once the obstacles are dealt with, we will be stronger.